Pain – my take #1

If you’re a runner or participate in any type of sport/activity you’ve most likely experienced pain.  There’s the physical pain; hurt feet, shin splints, knee injuries and sore joints.  There’s the emotional pain; losing and disappointment that can turn to anger or lack of sportsmanship for some.  As a runner I’m no stranger to the physical or emotional pain.  Let’s face it, I’m 45, and last time I checked the numbers keep going up, not down.

I’ve blogged before about my left knee.  There’s no doubt as long as I’m running that left knee is going to continue to hurt from time to time.  So, I’m just going to have to deal with the physical pain.  Emotionally, it sucks.  It’s a sign.  (Using best street voice) “Girl, you’re getting older, and that knee”, well….you know the deal.  I’m not complaining it just bothers me.  Not in a big way, I’m not scared of getting older, it’s just that I have a whole lotta fight left in me.  My mind is saying yes, but at times the body says no.

I received a call about 3 weeks ago from someone close to me.  It started with, “Laurel, I’ve got cancer”.  As, I sat and listened to the tears on the other end, my mind was racing about my own life.  It almost flashed before my eyes and instead of processing what the other person was saying I was thinking, my goodness what if this was me.  Wait! I’m not done here on earth, I’ve got so much to do still….okay breathe.  I listened. I consoled. I vowed to be there – and I will, because that’s what friends do – they stand by – and I will.  She proceeded to tell me about her pain.  The physical pain of the tests and the emotional pain of the results.  The not knowing what’s going to happen.  The exchanging of “I love yous”.  I suddenly felt embarrassed at the triviality of my own pain.  I know I shouldn’t be, I’m allowed to have my own pain. It doesn’t make me any better or worse, it does remind me someone’s always suffering more.  So tonight I lace up my shoes, bite my lip and deal with the pain…and I will.


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